Earlier this month I had the privilege to serve as a trainer at Date with Destiny, Tony Robbins’ signature seminar. In this 6-day seminar participants are being guided through a deeply profound process to discover their current values and mostly unconscious rules that are dominating their lives. They identify those areas that need to change, invite new emotions into their lives and condition new rules. We all experience positive and negative emotions on a daily basis. Let’s just make sure that we define new rules that help us to experience positive emotions much more easily and on the flip side rules that make it hard to feel negative emotions. Believe it or not, it works!

It was so moving to watch participants leaving behind a huge baggage of horrible experiences they were carrying all the way since their childhood and end up redefining their life’s purpose and setting inspiring goals for 2023. 

Our relationships are the biggest source of happiness and passion or deep pain. Therefore, a full day of the seminar was devoted to relationships. Expectations are usually a source of pain here. When we expect our partner to behave in a certain way. Many relationships seem to be stuck in a fight “your rules vs my rules”.  Can we trade expectations for appreciation instead and focus on what we can bring to this relationship, on who we need to become to take it to the next level?

The sources of unhappiness in a relationship are different dependent on whether you are more masculine or more feminine in your core. For the masculine, freedom is a core value. Being criticized or controlled by their partner or when the partner is closed are major stressors of the relationship. For the feminine it is feeling unseen, not understood, or unsafe.  In this realization lies a beautiful receipt for harmony.

As we are coming closer to Christmas, why not just focus on meeting each other’s needs?